


Beard Baubles

by Shatterpath



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Decorations, Christmas Fluff, F/M, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-27
Updated: 2015-01-27
Packaged: 2018-03-09 06:43:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3240095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shatterpath/pseuds/Shatterpath
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Never underestimate the power of humor... and Christmas decorations.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beard Baubles

**Author's Note:**

> So, on December 13th of 2014, this link stumbled into my Facebook feed. http://mashable.com/2014/12/11/beard-baubles-hipster-gift/?utm_cid=mash-com-Tw-main-link  
> As I've been writing a LOT of Avengers fic lately, this fic seemed a bit inevitable. I forgot all about it until just today when I finished it up, giving myself a good chuckle. It's silly and sweet and was tons of fun. Better late than never and I hope you enjoy!

It was a quiet Christmas morning, The Avengers gathering in the communal living spaces they favored in the tower to search out coffee and company. Steve futzed with breakfast while the assassins danced around him to procure caffeine and make nuisances of themselves and Bruce watched with a grin. One of these days, Steve would figure out that, like housecats, Natasha and Clint annoyed him and got underfoot because they liked him. In the meantime, his exasperated affection was too much fun to watch. It also saved on dishes, because they just stole off his plate as though it were all a terrific game. Better than having them bored one could suppose. Oddly, Jane was alone, curled up on the couch, yawning over a mug that Natasha had casually provided. Their numbers increased when Pepper walked in, clad as they all were, in morning-casual, her expression amused and pained.

"Merry Christmas, everyone. All I can say is, really, you don't want to know."

Before any of them could do more than begin to return the holiday greeting, a startled silence fell.

"Man, you looked like Christmas upchucked on you."

Clint's words weren't inaccurate, but Jane's gasp was even more telling.

"Oh my god, Darcy, what did you do?"

If Tony and Darcy were smugly resplendent in ugly-Christmas-sweater glory-- complete with matching fleece pants, slippers, Darcy's sparkling hair bow and something that honest to Abe looked like ornaments hanging from Tony's goatee-- than Thor had been garbed up to be something truly epic. The pseudo Christmas elf outfit on his massive frame was both impressive and horrifying, but the awful cardigan almost improved it and the bits of fake greenery woven into his hair was downright demure by comparison. But it was the array of cluster of tiny, colorful ornaments neatly worked into his beard really capped it off.

"What, no lights?" Natasha asked dryly into the stunned quiet. Jane gawked like a landed fish as Thor strutted over, clearly pleased with his look.

"I am festive," he proclaimed enthusiastically and the stifled giggling dissolved into laughter, even Jane beginning to break. After a moment of posing and preening, Thor bowed deeply and with a dramatic flourish that added applause and catcalling to the anarchy. After holding the bow, long hair nearly on the floor, Thor stood up regally -- looked ridiculous with the holiday massacre all over him -- and held the haughty demeanor just long enough for the hilarity to start dying down before breaking into a wild grin.

"You had us going there for a minute!" Steve laughed as the bigger man stripped his entire top half in one sinuous twist, only the most persistent of the beard baubles and one sprig of fake fir clinging to him. "Letting us think you were serious about that look. Good one!"

"Tony and Darcy assured me that the humor would work," Thor chortled, delighted with himself as he tossed the monstrosity to the side and leaned over to greet Jane properly, hesitating when she shied away.

"Really, Darcy, some of your ideas," the scientist sighed and plucked one more of the baubles from the darkly gold beard before tugging her lover in to be kissed thoroughly. The others resumed their catcalling for a moment before turning the attentions to tormenting Darcy and Tony.

"I forget sometimes what a wicked sense of humor you can have," Jane teased quietly as she stroked his chin, drinking up his smile.

"My playfulness is as much for your pleasure as mine as theirs," Thor murmured back and kissed at her fingers in passing. "Tis harmless fun and your expression was indescribable."

"I bet. Merry Christmas, you big idiot."

"Merry Christmas."


End file.
